Sunday, April 18, 2010

Two Weeks

I've been living on my own for two weeks. I still have pictures to hang, boxes to sort and unpack but I'm here. Much like me, the dogs are still adjusting. Sophie has bursts of energy - she's used to having Serena around all day, also my long days of school and work, Andrew was the first home and did much entertaining in the evenings. I feel sadness and guilt when I come home at 8:30pm and I still need to eat dinner and do homework and all she wants is 20 minutes outside this tiny apartment... it will take some adjusting.

Buddy had a fit of anxiety last week. He licks himself (and possibly chews) his hind legs until they bleed. Very sad and stressful for both of us. He ate his legs raw last week. I spray bitter apple on him; he'll lick through it or wipe it off on the sofa (then I'm stuck with a stained and smelly sofa). I feel horrible, but my only choice is to cone him. He's blind, going deaf and now coned.

Last night was movie night at Audrey's. Graham made dinner and we watched Identity (John Cusack). Had a wonderful time with my friends, but driving home felt the pang of reality - I was the third wheel and I'm going home to no one. I allow myself to be sad with this. No use denying it or trying to fight it. It passes. I cry, feel awful but remind myself that I deserve someone honest and kind; qualities that were not bestowed upon me the past several months.

I had a math test this morning, think I did well. I'm home now and have two papers to work on; WR122 and PSY201. The weather is pretty but chilly. It should be a productive day in front of the computer.

I was very proud of myself yesterday - I finally put the Bowflex together!! It sat in pieces in the garage for a year and half because it was too tall to fit in our older apartment.

You can't be sad when you're Bowflexing.
There's no crying in Bowflexing!!!

Happy Sunday everyone.

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