I received a piece of snail mail today from a friend who has touched a very soft spot in my soul. I can't remember how we met but I know her through my sister. Laura is a smart and sensitive woman and I just adore her. She is a writer, a giver, funny and witty. I could count on one hand how many times we've hung out, but she's just one of those people that you instantly connect with.
I have left no room for doubt regarding the sadness and sense of loss and heartache I've felt from my break-up with Andrew and no longer being Serena's owner. This ordeal is one of those big yet few experiences that a woman has in her life time that contributes to how she values not only the love she receives, but the value she places on the love she can give.
Laura sent me a letter responding to an email I sent her when I was feeling especially low. I do not want to reveal too much here, but I read her letter no less then three times, tearful. It is a relief to know that the sadness I felt, though I want no one else to go through it, is not mine alone. To not be told to just move on, that shit happens, a million other women go through this and to basically not acknowledge this loss - is refreshing. It's comforting.
I do not dwell, but I do acknowledge. I will not swallow up emotions and lock them up. I am too much of a believer that we should all be more honest with expressions; there is less confusion and more healing that way.
"I now believe, with all of my heart, that the better you become at caring for and honoring yourself, the better your chances become for meeting a male version of yourself."
Genius, Laura. Expect my letter soon.