Wednesday, March 31, 2010

I'm back!!

Comast guy left and I couldn't wait to jump on and blog!! I'm reconnected to the internet and tv. Ahhh... I know what time it is by what tv show in playing while I do my homework.

I'm in my new apartment. I didn't have hot water for the first three days and went without the internet for five, but I am here.

Going to tie up the loose ends this weekend; clean the old place and turn in the keys. Then...? A new day. A new tomorrow.

It hit me last night as I was journaling what (one of) my big dilemmas' is; I feel betrayed and heart broken but I need to forget all that. Move on. But how???!!!

I need to forgive him.

One cannot forget unless they forgive. This concept is a challenge. I'm ashamed to admit that I am not very good at forgiving people, or myself. I don't want this situation to play over and over again in my mind, my heart - and with each rerun bring the tears and stop me from moving forward.

So please, I ask the advice of you bloggernet - how do you forgive?


Jessica said...

I think it's easier for me to just move on and not to dwell; I'm good at detaching any emotion from a given situation and then making a rational decision.

We're wired differently and I know things like this are tough for you. Good luck.

Hayley Freakin' Rules said...

Jess, to me you are "Doth I Protest Too Much" by Alanis Morissette. Your sisterly advice is so greatly appreciated and I value your strengths :)

Alyssa said...

I dont know if there is a way to forgive. I certainly struggle with it. I had a massive fight with my dad last night about stuff that happened like 10 years ago, thats how badly i hold only stuff.

Then today i read a quote that said let go of the things you cannot change.

And i thought it there much point holding on to resentment of the ex that cheated. or things my dad did (cheated, bastard) or anything that i really have no control over. Its going to bring my life down hating on people for things that no matter much i dwell over it they are not going to be able to take it back.

Dunno if thinking that quote will work but i guess you just have to "let it go"